Killer Croc loose in Hamilton

I don't want to alarm you. I am not a scientist nor a particularly paranoid person.
The following story has been relegated to the novelty section of several local newspapers and overlooked completely by some of our most important national newspapers. I cannot believe that this situation has been given so little prominence, considering it's dire ramifications.

Believe me people, this is NOT responsible journalism. Have none of you seen "Lake Placid", or "Alligator," both cautionary tales based on real events in which a loose Gator terrorizes a nearby community?

I have read all the articles I can find about this week's shocking development. This account may be paraphrased but I assure you it is has been culled from every publication that covered the frightening event.

It seems that the beast was first discovered by a wildlife photographer who was nearly decapitated in the jaws of a "crocodile type creature" while taking shots in Hamilton's Confederation Park.

The exact location seems to be a pond off of Van Wagners Beach Road, behind the seasonal restaurant Baranga's On The Beach. As the Hamilton Spectator has reported, "The pond leads into the Red Hill Creek, which leads into the Windermere Basin and eventually Lake Ontario."

What, that little terrifying fact was not the story's lead?

The bodies will be stacked high; well, as high as you can stack half digested body parts.

Reptile expert Bry Loyst, who runs a Reptile Zoo near Peterborough, was called in to try and capture the creature. Loyst confirmed the worst of my fears, "The creature is crocodilian, which means it’s one of the world’s 23 species of alligators and crocodiles."

Hell no. Oh Jesus, no. He won't be able to stop it.

Loyst narrowed his eyes and loaded another clip with armour piercing shells. He takes this seriously. And the stump that should be his left arm tells me that. He will do his best, but this is a battle we could lose.

“Obviously, it was someone’s pet. Hundreds and hundreds are brought in every year from the United States to be sold as pets.”
PARDON? TOTAL SHOCK CORRIDOR!

This is a pending disaster. Our bountiful waterways could become killing ponds for rogue American gators. This is NOT front page news? Can't we warn our people?

Loyst regularly catches alligators that are abandoned in lakes and ponds when they grow too big for owners to keep. Some take dozens of shells to finally kill, but others, he has to dynamite. That means, rig rotten chicken carcases with massive amounts of explosive and when the Croc bites, the switch gets flipped. CABOOM! Teeth and Gator skin fill the air. And sometimes, the half digested limbs of some of their human lunch.

You have to destroy the head. Remember that scene in Jaws? Same principle. Kill the head and with it, the instinct to kill.

Imported Crocs from America?
This is a far greater threat than illegal handguns or crystal meth permeating our borders. Dozens, if not thousands of crocodilian creatures could be lurking below the surface of ponds and creeks across Ontario. Growing larger, just waiting to snatch your dog, or your entire family with one flash of its massive, fatal jaws.
So, if the Hamilton Croc gets into Lake Ontario, and I am certain it will, suddenly hundreds of thousands of people are potential prey.

Forget about the canal links between Great lakes. We have to get the warning out to Lake Ontario communities RIGHT NOW.
GRIMSBY, ST. CATHERINES, NIAGARA, ROCHESTER, OSWEGO, GILL HARBOR, PICTON, BRIGHTON, PORT HOPE, TORONTO...

You are all vulnerable to GATOR ATTACK! Be warned, and do not let your kids or pets within 100 feet of the waters of Lake Ontario, or any water that could be connected to it, or traversed by a crocodile.

This lake we live on, this massive and fresh body of water could soon be known as Lake Croc Attack; the northern most Croc infested point in the world.